When I moved to New York, the dream was to be a New York actor. By all accounts, I achieved that goal. There was something else that happened along the way that wasn’t part of the plan- not at all. I started babysitting pretty soon after moving. I was introduced to families through friends and church. My name got passed around more and more. I babysit kids as young as 11 weeks old to 10 years old. I spent time in apartments and homes all over Manhattan, Brooklyn and even New Jersey. Parents trusted me and doormen got used to seeing me. City parks, playgrounds and libraries became familiar stomping grounds. I sang a lot, played with legos and had hands hold mine. I would say that i’m not sure I realized the impact of it all as it was happening, but that wouldn’t be true. I did realize it. It’s a privilege to be a part of a child’s life and be loved by them.

I have a friend who wrote a song called Magic. The lyrics mention having a patchwork heart. She sings about moving to different cities or different homes and how parts of ourselves get left in each place. And while that’s inevitable, we pick up new bits along the way. New pieces to plug the holes of our heart that we left behind - the patchwork heart. She sings, it’s lovely, it’s tragic; but to love something so much, it’s magic.

And those words ring true for me because when I think about these kids, it was lovely to get to spend time with them, to calm them down, to read with them, laugh and cry with them and rock them to sleep…but it’s tragic to think that a day will come when they forget about me or maybe they already have. But goodness, it was magic and i’m happy that my heart is patched up with all those memories -I couldn’t have dreamed up a better non-plan.